Happy fucking New Year. 20 years ago, I had a mullet probably.

So what a long fucking weekend. Thanks to nobody doing much work in my department, I spent my Saturday, and my Sunday evening in the office, literally doing mundane data entry that needed to be done by year end. Saturday, after getting out of the record shop at 2, I sped over to the office and worked until about 8:30. My eyes were red like tomatoes. I was going to go back the next morning, but I needed more preparation. So I hit the convenient store on the way and bought a ton of junk food. I was thinking that the guy at the counter was going to think how much of a pig I am. Of course, after he rang me up he said �Bon Appetit�� I�m thinking, �yeah, I�m a fat pig, I get it�fuck you.� I got to work at 1:00, and stayed until 9:30. By the end of the daylight I was talking to myself, and seeing things that weren�t there. I didn�t even finish my work either. This week, I am going to crack the whip and give my crew some new rules and regulations that will probably make me look like an asshole. Ask me if I care. Go ahead. No, I don�t. I�m sick of being taken advantage of because I�m a �nice guy�. Oh well.

Let�s all toast JDG, for what sounded like a good Thursday for him last week.

New Years Eve was good. Angela, Dan, and I went to a party at a friend of hers� house. I was the only one not drinking. It�s funny, I don�t really feel out of place like I used to when I would be the only sober one there. If I can make it through all the peer pressure I have made it through lately, then I don�t really ever need to taste alcohol again. It�s not like I think it�s that bad. It�s just one thing I don�t need to do. I already have enough bad habits as it is. Although nobody ever crashed a car into a tree for jerking off too much did they?

It�s funny how nobody really calls anymore. My phone bill should be cheaper anyway. It�s not though. I don�t mind the lack of calls though. Seems when folks find a new interest (a new girl/boy, new friends, etc), they don�t need to call boring me. I feel like at this point I could rot here in the room. I rarely have the desire to go anywhere anymore. When I do, it had better be something exciting in a small way anyway. I�m fine with the air in here. Outside you have to talk to people, you have to run into people from the past you don�t need to. You have to meet people, and look them in the eye. Something I�ve no interest in. I�m fine with the few people who call and visit. I�m happy that I have the band to do when we do it.

�I will smash with the hammer, and smash�

I feel a stuffed nose, and sore throat coming on. It is a tad miserable feeling, but nothing that needs to keep me from going to work, or not moving. People are such pussies. My head is congested, don�t look at me! Fuck you, get over it, and move along. Don�t fucking tell me about it. The only people you need to know are sick are your girlfriend, or boyfriend, however you step up to the plate. I don�t need to know the guy down the hall feels like shit. I don�t need to know my friend Bill is sick. I don�t give a shit. Why would I care about something like that? Now, get cancer, or something, then I�ll care. You have a cold, then don�t whine to me. You sound like a fucking 9 year old girl when you do that. For the record, I feel just a little under the weather. I think it�s because I was with a group of people last night. That�s when you seem to get sick. The old saying �I�m allergic to people� is true. I told you.

We have no gigs lined up right now. God do the booking agents suck ass. These people never fucking call you back. They are harder to get in touch with than me. Perhaps karma for all the times I look at the caller ID, and then get back to doing whatever I was doing? I haven�t answered the phone in work in three months. These bill collectors from this magazine subscription scam I got involved in called me every fucking day over and over and left messages. I was so close to picking up the phone and saying �Why wasn�t your company in the World Trade Center on September 11th of 2001?� They are evil. I want to hire someone to release anthrax into their office. What happened to that anyway? That went out quicker than parachute pants did in 1986. I want more anthrax scares! This silly hunt for Osama in boring now that all the fun missiles and blowing shit up is over. Let�s at least have something juicy to look at on the TV. And why were Jesse Helms, or Strom Thurmand not anthraxicated? They should have been the first on the list. Speaking of television. I�ve had none for over a month now. I�ve been preoccupied with movies, and video games, and books (oh my god!), and guitar since the cable was shut off. I hate the television anyway, it�s useless for the most part, if anything, it adds a little ambience to a dark room, but for the most part there is 98% shit on.

My favorite guitar player in the world, Marc Ribot, is coming to a club that is a five minute walk from my office. The question is, do I attempt to shake his hand at one point, and see if it rubs off on me? I think this gig is just him and a guitar, no band, which should be cool. He is god. I recommend picking up anything with his name on it. He has a few solo record, some records of Cuban music, and then plays on all sorts of random stuff like Elvis Costello records, and of course the great Tom Waits records from his early Island records stuff.

I like this old ska music. Who the hell decided No Doubt was Ska? What went on at that meeting? Furthermore, why was Pink wearing that god awful outfit on the Rockin in the New Year with Dick Clark? She normally looks good, but she looked like the No Doubt chick last night, and the clothes were hideous. She will definitely end up in the �What People Are Wearing� section of Star magazine. Pop culture nowadays is too much for me. Maybe I�m just too old, or out of touch with it, but first off, the music is so fucking shitty. It makes me want to slap people. Let�s slap some people for the hell of it. Ready. Because rock and roll has been sold to the people it�s being sold to now, I refuse to pay attention. Yeah, this is my announcement, that I will continue to not pay attention to pop music, or culture(although I want to see that Lord of the Rings movie, but after that, forget it.). I realized last year I barely saw any gigs. Besides the ones we played, where we watched other bands, I didn�t pay attention.

So I want to add more to my best records of 2001. First off, the new Thought Industry record. Secondly, the new Anathema record, and lastly this CD called Her Space Holiday, which I picked up because of the cover, and the little blurb on the sticker that used the word �melancholy�. I used a gift certificate to get it, and I�m glad I took the chance. It�s a good record. I�m actually not sure if it even came out this year. The Thought Industry CD reminds me of later Into Another/Cave In/Failure, etc. It�s pretty cool, and it�s on Metal Blade. I also picked up a bunch of new stuff old and new: some compilation of guitar driven instrumentals from the 60�s. Which reminds me that I should tell Aarne that we got that box set back in at the record shop with all of the 60�s garage punk stuff. I think they are all British bands. The Thin Lizzy box set, yet another copy of Slayer Hell Awaits, a couple of those later era Ramones records that each have like 5 good songs on them, some Duke Ellington double CD of live stuff from Carnegie Hall, and a Coltrane retrospective that I realized I already had everything on it. I owned that CD for less than 24 hours. That 3 disc set on Impulse. It is a nice collection, I should have kept it as a compilation of �Trane for the car, but I didn�t.

The video store guys don�t talk about Kevin Smith anymore thankfully. And why is the one African American guy in there named Alvin? Come to think about it, he does look a bit like a chipmunk. I don�t know that I�d be able to work there. It�s always a challenge for me to go in there. It�s usually late at night. They have some sort of policy that as soon as you walk through the door they ask you how you�re doing. �I�m doing great, can I take my fucking coat off first though?�. A couple of the guys in there make me want to finally shoot a gun. I�ve never shot a gun. I�ve always preferred knives when I attack people.

Knock on wood that this computer is being a good boy lately.

I am wired at 2:30 right now, but I do need to attempt to get to sleep. That is all.

before & after