(conversation with myself, 3:42AM EST this morning)

I am here to explain

what?

I want to come clean with this

with what?

with everything

okay then

I�m sick

sick?

I�m sick of this

sick of what?

I�m sick of lying

Lying?

lying to myself, and others when they ask me how I�m doing

you lie about it?

of course I do, who do you think I am?

well, I thought you seemed like an honest guy

right

what do you lie about?

I�m not doing okay

huh?

I�m not happy, in the least bit right now

why not?

because I�m not doing that good

how so?

stop asking me so many questions

why did you come here?

I need help

from yourself?

yes

how do you suppose you can help yourself?

By talking to you about it

talking to yourself?

yes

are all of those painkillers in the cabinet still?

I�m hungry today. I�m hungry, and I need a new job. I am not surviving like this. I am not even coming close. Like I said, the easier option would be to crash the car into a tree before they repossess it. did you see the game yesterday? no I didn

t fucknig see the fkuckin game yesterday, do I loook kiliek I give a fukc what happenes in whatever gmame your tklkaling about? you fukls don�t GET IT!

once they fuck one chick, once they ejaculate once, once they make her come, once they put their hands down pants, once they reach for rock hard cocks, is when they start making less and less phone calls. we all do. once you start fucking you can�t stop. once you start fucking�

I have a pain in my back right now, like the headaches I get, it feels like if I took a knife and stuck it in my own back, the pain would go away, let�s see what happens

feels kind of good. feels normal

ghost

feels like it

fuck yeah.

the XXXXXXXXX

before & after