1) Nick Cave � I�ve given this guy time and time to sink in, and it hasn�t happened yet. Nick Cave sucks, admit it.

2) Dashboard Confessional � one of the guys in my band, who�s musical taste could easily make someone question his sexuality, tells me there is some early record by these guys or something that is good. Fuck you, there is no possible way that this band could ever do anything called �good�.

3) Bjork � Bjork has the body of a nine years old Japanese boy, and the voice of a blind retarded girl from Antarctica, why would I want to listen to that?

4) Joan of Arc � This band just flat out sucks more than anything could suck. I like a lot of music that sounds like it makes no sense, but this just doesn�t make sense that nobody has hit these guys over the head with a sock full of nickels.

5) Napalm Death � this band sucked everytime they walked into a recording studio, or onto a stage. If you actually like heavy metal music, stay away from this fucking band.

In work now. Just got done almost driving my car into the side of this woman�s Lexus SUV, bronze colored. Fuck women in Lexus SUV�s. I�m not saying we should fuck them, well unless it�s L�il Kim, or Foxy Brown, or the one I saw on BET last night�she�s got Missy Elliot in the video with her, and she has her hair dyed red. Anyway, if she was in a Lexus SUV, and asked me to hop in for a drive. I would throw out any socially motivated anti-SUV viewpoints I may have. But, you should drive your car into Lexus SUV�s tomorrow with women in them. I think we should have National, or International Drive Your Car Into The Side of a Woman in a Lexus SUV Day. I think it will be tomorrow. If you want to do this, please let me know, and take a picture. I am planning on trying to hit a few women in Lexus SUV�s. I just got a raise at work. So I think it will be worth it to have my insurance go up.

Top people who have drank piss that I know

1) Dave Randall � Dave was a punk rocker with us in the 80�s, later 80�s, he was a bit younger than me. He disappeared at one point into obscurity. One time, in I guess 1992 I heard Dave had OD�d on heroin and died. I kind of wrote him off. 4 years later, I ran into some girl and she asked if I had heard what happened to Dave. I said yeah yada yada yada. And she replied she had just seen him a month previous. Turns out Dave hadn�t died when I thought he did, it was four years later. At one point Dave drank a bottle of Peter S�s piss that was in an Orange Slice bottle.

2) Pat Seesomething � Pat drank a bunch of the little disasters piss out of a punch bowl one night. Thankfully I wasn�t there, for if I was, I would surely have started cutting people in half with a laser beam.

3) Some dude Tim � When I worked in Billerica Massachusetts a few years back, this hot girl worked at the Walgreens next to me. I was asking around about her one day to some locals, and they told �she pissed in some dude Tim�s mouth at a party one night�

4) somebody someone told me about recently but I can�t remember the story

Top5 things I have given up caring about at this point in the summer of 2002

1) my health

2) the Red Sox, or sports in general

3) romance

4) new music being any good

5) Breaux�s Insane Clown Posse shirt

before & after