I can�t stop listening to this stevie wonder guy here. I just put the second disc of the day in by him.

I got home today from a trip to Maine for the weekend, and after being home for 12 hours now or whatever it is, I�m reminded why I do some of the shit I do. You talk to however many people and you have updates on this and that. I�m not innocent in this department that�s for certain. I was told once that it was obvious that I lived these private lives that people didn�t know about. I guess this is partly true, but who doesn�t? How different am I to every person I interact with on a daily basis from when I�m alone? Much different. I don�t think anyone would dig me. I�m boring, I don�t talk much, and if I�m alone, I of course turn the music loud, so you wouldn�t be able to talk anyway. But, yeah I keep things from people for my own reasons from time to time. Nobody needs to know everything about me, and I certainly don�t need to know everything about everyone I know. I think it�s one thing to be honest with people for the most part, but I also think a lot of shit is nobody�s business but your own, especially in the relationship/sex, etc department. With the size of my mouth, and the size of the rumor mill, and everyone else in the world who exists, it�s impossible to do anything without someone, somewhere forming an opinion, bad or good. I of course do the same thing, I�ve been trying not to as much, so I try to form my own opinions on people, or situations, but it doesn�t really matter, my opinion, so why even say anything. This is why I didn�t mention to anyone that I was going away with a good friend I like to hang out with. It seems most of the people we all know don�t like her, so I don�t mention her name much. I don�t need to hear opinions, and I certainly don�t need to validate anything, so I just don�t say anything. I know I can be just as bad with this stuff too, so, to avoid any of it, in any form, why not just be quiet. Anyway, we had a great time, and my face is sunburned now, and I am well rested, and the area we were in, had a buttload (no pun intended) of gay men. I forgot about that part of it. I saw folks in a Lexus put their hands to their mouths when two men kissed crossing the street in front of them. It�s kind of a strange mix of upper class people, and gay men and women everywhere. Kind of strange. I like it up there though. They say, �the way life should be�. Not sure about that, but�.

Today was a bit of an adventure once I got home. I was in dozens of different towns throughout the north shore of Massachusetts. I had to drive to East Boston, where �my people come from� to run an errand that I don�t need to talk about here, or else I will have to kill whomever reads. I played along with an Elmore James record as soon as I got in. I like playing the blues on the guitar now, it�s a bit fun. I forgot to bring my guitar with me, it was the first thing I did when I got in the house actually. After realizing that I needed to change the g, b, and e strings I put it down and did the East Boston thing. At one point today I thought I was going to be blown open with a shotgun. How many times does that happen to a person on an average day? I sold some items at this shop in Salem, some CD�s that is, and picked up the reissue of Wigout at Denko�s, the second Dag Nasty record. That�s a good fucking record. �Safe� is being put on a mixed cd as soon as I�m done with this fucking journal thing tonight. I then went to another CD shop, walked around for an hour with the following ideas: the Brad Meldhau Trio, Cocteau Twins � Victorialand (for Dan, not sure if he owns it, if not, Dan, they have it in Peabody, used, get the fucking thing), another Burt Bacharach CD, a Harry Nillson tribute CD, something by Elvis after deciding over the weekend that I need to start getting some of his shit from the catalog, 2 good box sets are not good enough for me right now, some Brother Jack McDuff CD, etc. I then saw it, that Tom Petty anthology that Breaux and I always talk about. I never thought there would come a day when I bought a Tom Petty CD. I probably sealed my fate of never sleeping with the girl who rang me up now. I always fuck everything up. I then made it to the mans house for a quick purchase, a run in with his sister, the little disaster, who surprised me, and I surprised her, a brief �hug� and a �call me we�ll hang out� from her, and my mind was back on the transaction at hand. I forgot she existed five minutes later, and made my way out of there. I talked to someone else tonight that knows the disaster, and her opinion was none to glamorous as well, although who knows what to think of her opinions anyway�the rest of my boring life is not really open to discussion anyway. Yada yada yada.

�Just like Pagliacci did,

I try to keep my sadness hid.�

before & after