What�s with the gothic shit today with me? I�m apparently depressed, or, maybe I�m feeling in love with death. Shit, I know why. So on my way to work this morning, right near my work, when I�m 4 minutes away, and I have to drive through �that fucking Tufts University mother fucker of a rotary� there are 2 funeral parlors. So I�m sitting at a red light, and I look over, and these guys with the casket, and they drop the casket, and this headless body falls out!! Fuck! Seriously though, I�m sitting at the red light, and they stopped us so the funeral procession could drive by, and the hearse drives by, which you can never really see anything except the outline of a casket usually, and then the limousine behind it with presumably the immediate family. I make eye contact with this young man in the back. His head is literally pressed against the window of the limo, with the most distraught look I�ve ever seen on a persons face in my life. It was powerful, and pretty much ruined the morning for me. Was this his father in the hearse, his brother? His wife? Who knows, but rest assured whoever it was, he�s most likely not listening to the Cure right now with a smile on, as I am. Not that I spend my days with this shit eating grin on listening to them or anything. As a matter of fact though, the Cure doesn�t have the same effect on me as it used to. I used to not be able to listen to certain songs, or albums, now, it�s so long ago, I can deal with them without getting depressed.

I don�t think the band has sounded better than it has right now. I say �it� as it is an �it�, not a �we�, sure it�s a democracy (when I�m not so high I forget how to play songs and sing), but I like to think of us as a thing that makes music, a group of personalities that create some kind of fucking mood that hopefully affects someone else at some point. I updated a little of our website (click on �check out my rock band�, below) tonight, when I should have been doing some shit for work. I�m learning �Beast of Burden� on guitar right now, not that we�d ever play that song in this band, but it�s one of my all time favorite songs that have ever existed in the history of songs existing. Without further ado, my favorite, all time single songs that I could listen to 9 times in a row and not care

1) Rolling Stones Beast of Burden � okay, it�s a little cheesy, and if anyone ever caught me singing �All I want is for you to make love to me� stopped at a red light I would feel like an idiot, but�

2) Galaxie 500 � 4th of July � the soundtrack of my winter in 1992�wait, am I that old? Yikes�

3) Bob Dylan � Stuck Inside of Mobile (with the Memphis Blues Again) � this should actually be at the top of the list. I can even recite all nine verses, watch:

Oh, the ragman draws circles

Up and down the block.

I'd ask him what the matter was

But I know that he don't talk.

And the ladies treat me kindly

And furnish me with tape,

But deep inside my heart

I know I can't escape.

Oh, Mama, can this really be the end,

To be stuck inside of Mobile

With the Memphis blues again.

Well, Shakespeare, he's in the alley

With his pointed shoes and his bells,

Speaking to some French girl,

Who says she knows me well.

And I would send a message

To find out if she's talked,

But the post office has been stolen

And the mailbox is locked.

Oh, Mama, can this really be the end,

To be stuck inside of Mobile

With the Memphis blues again.

Mona tried to tell me

To stay away from the train line.

She said that all the railroad men

Just drink up your blood like wine.

An' I said, "Oh, I didn't know that,

But then again, there's only one I've met

An' he just smoked my eyelids

An' punched my cigarette."

Oh, Mama, can this really be the end,

To be stuck inside of Mobile

With the Memphis blues again.

Grandpa died last week

And now he's buried in the rocks,

But everybody still talks about

How badly they were shocked.

But me, I expected it to happen,

I knew he'd lost control

When he built a fire on Main Street

And shot it full of holes.

Oh, Mama, can this really be the end,

To be stuck inside of Mobile

With the Memphis blues again.

Now the senator came down here

Showing ev'ryone his gun,

Handing out free tickets

To the wedding of his son.

An' me, I nearly got busted

An' wouldn't it be my luck

To get caught without a ticket

And be discovered beneath a truck.

Oh, Mama, can this really be the end,

To be stuck inside of Mobile

With the Memphis blues again.

Now the preacher looked so baffled

When I asked him why he dressed

With twenty pounds of headlines

Stapled to his chest.

But he cursed me when I proved it to him,

Then I whispered, "Not even you can hide.

You see, you're just like me,

I hope you're satisfied."

Oh, Mama, can this really be the end,

To be stuck inside of Mobile

With the Memphis blues again.

Now the rainman gave me two cures,

Then he said, "Jump right in."

The one was Texas medicine,

The other was just railroad gin.

An' like a fool I mixed them

An' it strangled up my mind,

An' now people just get uglier

An' I have no sense of time.

Oh, Mama, can this really be the end,

To be stuck inside of Mobile

With the Memphis blues again.

When Ruthie says come see her

In her honky-tonk lagoon,

Where I can watch her waltz for free

'Neath her Panamanian moon.

An' I say, "Aw come on now,

You must know about my debutante."

An' she says, "Your debutante just knows what you need

But I know what you want."

Oh, Mama, can this really be the end,

To be stuck inside of Mobile

With the Memphis blues again.

Now the bricks lay on Grand Street

Where the neon madmen climb.

They all fall there so perfectly,

It all seems so well timed.

An' here I sit so patiently

Waiting to find out what price

You have to pay to get out of

Going through all these things twice.

Oh, Mama, can this really be the end,

To be stuck inside of Mobile

With the Memphis blues again.

That, is the best song ever written in the history of songs existing.

4) The Cure � Shake Dog Shake � the best waking up in the morning with a �what the fuck did I do last night� feeling inside you

5) The Pixies � Wave of Mutilation (surf version) � From the Pump Up the Volume soundtrack, as if the song isn�t good enough on the Doolittle album, they had to record this ultra cool slowed down version

6) Neil Young �On the Beach � the best song ever, wait, this should be # 1

7) Tom Waits � Jockey Full of Bourbon � Not only does this have Marc Ribot on guitar, but it�s also�ummm, just a great song by the best song writer that has ever existed in the history of songwriters existing.

8) Blue Oyster Cult � Cities on Flame � �Cities on Flame! With Rock and Roll!!!�

9) Cocteau Twins � Persephone � It�s off of one of the best records ever recorded in the history of records being recorded, Treasure so it has to be good.

10) The Beatles � Across the Universe, wait I mean, A Day in the Life, I mean I Am the Walrus, wait, I mean While My Guitar Gently Weeps, yeah, that one, that�s my favorite Beatles song, as well as being one of my top ten songs in the history of songs existing.

11) Throwing Muses � Hate My Way, or Call Me, whatever the one with the �Here I am, what a loser� line exists�and no, I didn�t put this in here because Cuillin or however you spell it signed the guestbook and likes them as well�

12) Peter Tosh � Legalize It � Okay, it�s not really one of my favorite songs in the history of songs existing, but it�s about legalizing marijuana, and I am a hippie, so�

13) Captain Beefheart � Her Eyes are a Blue Million Miles � a great love song for a mix tape�if the girl has green, I mean, blue eyes.

14) NWA � Niggaz 4 Life � I just wanted to put a �racist� word in my diary, without actually being a racist myself. It is a good song though�

15) Fugazi � Reclamation � A great pro choice song sung from a woman�s perspective, Ian�s second song singing as a �she� I wonder if he�s�actually, no�

16) James Brown � For Goodness Sakes, Look at those Cakes � Even if you�ve never heard this song, you have to admit that the song title alone deems it worthy of any best of list.

17) Todd Rundgren � Hello, It�s Me � No, I�m not gay.

18) The Damned � Machine Gun Ettiquette � It�s the best song they have in my opinion�

19) Bad Brains � At the Movies � There�s no way to pick one favorite Bad Brains song, so I�ll just say my 19th favorite songs is �The Bad Brains � Everything ever��

20) Barbara Streisand � Take Me From Behind, Now � A little known B-side from Babs during her �sexy� period (post Funny Face, pre Yentl)

21) Creed � I Love Jesus So Much, I Think I need to Confess that I just Masturbated � another little know b-side from the Creed boys, one of my favorite bands of all time

22) Britney Spears � These Tits are Real (acoustic version) a classic from the Spears catalog

23) James Brown � Papa�s Got a Brand New Colostomy Bag � He just recorded this one last year

24) Morrissey � I�ve Gained Some Weight, Haven�t I? � Morrissey gets personal

25) Sting � I Just Fucked My Wife, Tantrically, for a Week � Sting talks about his love of Tantric sex, and then continues fucking his wife�is there such a word as �Tantrically�?

26) Paul McCartney � How About This For a Stupid Looking Face? � Paul sings a song about how stupid he usually looks

before & after