I�ve been glued to the newspaper, the television, and the internet, and you know what, I hope we keep blowing the shit out of the Taliban. Just thought I�d say that. More dead people? Big deal.

So I started writing some shit last night but I couldn�t get my head concentrated, so here goes. I was thinking back to a few years back, and how I used to be this quiet, shy person. With girls especially. I always thought that the best relationships were ones that came from girls you�re introduced to from mutual friends and the like. My current relationship started like that actually. There were times in the past though, where I tried to dive into the �Asking out a stranger� thing. For the most part I either didn�t do it correctly, or the girl was a fuckhead anyway.

So there�s this coffee place that sells a good amount of Donuts. People I know would go there and drink the coffee, and occasionally (at what age am I going to finally learn how to deal with the word �occasionally�? I�ve been relying on �spell check� to get me through it for years now. I don�t think that �spell check� will be able to hold my hand with it�s little red underline when the shit goes down though and someone asks me to spell it in �real life�) have a donut and a smoke. Sometimes a lot of donuts, and a lot of cigarettes. Eventually, people got themselves some sort of responsibility in their lives, and moved on. Me, I kept going to get them there donuts, or rather coffee. So they hired this girl in there. She was pretty cute to me at the time. In retrospect, it may have not been the best idea. So at one point I went in and said hello and then was outside having a cigarette and she came out. I started chatting with her, and eventually said �so, do you wanna hang out sometime?� She said yeah, and for me to come by on Sunday. I had a bath, and went back on Sunday and went in and said hello or whatever. I waited outside and was talking to someone when I turned around and saw her pulling out of the parking lot with some other girl. Yikes. I eventually did start hanging with her and her group of friends, which lasted all of a winter. That was the last time I was sick. 1997. I had a cold for a month. I haven�t had a cold, fever, flu or anything since.

There were a couple more of those things that happened, until I retired being a smooth operator after that.

There were lesbians and there were men talking about different drugs there were dudes with their cocks out on chopping blocks waiting to be cut in half or something like that there were dudes there were all sorts of clowns and men with masks there were images of people with their arms being ripped off and their were all sorts of different melodies and images of musical notes and different instruments and there were people staring at me and I didn�t know how to approach it I knew on the next day I would be killing myself or so I thought there were people asking me questions are you alright are you from around here you feel like a foreigner from a different country when you are around these people you feel like you are not going to be able to control yourself there were men who thought their scripts were written better than this man there were girls who thought they couldn�t spend another dime on revlon there were men caressing their sweaty heineken bottles with absolutely not a glimmer of honesty in their eyes there were all sorts of wallets and lights they talked in this language I�d never heard before they even had all the fingers on their hands the sounds in there were always all over the place you hear the singing you hear the voices you hear the echo chamber hello is anyone there you wonder if you are actually the only one with blood inside their heads you wonder if with all of the noise and everything people are just there to entertain my fiendish thoughts from time to time I wonder how long it would actually take me to finally break and do things I would regret the next day how capable am I of hurting peoples feelings I�m pretty fucking capable of it I just need to have gasoline thrown on me first and then it�s all over I wonder how long it would take to make it into the newspaper I wonder if with all of the secret information I have I could bury politicians and rock singers just the same I wonder how many souls I could break in a week I bet I could piss more people off than you that must mean I�m doing something horribly wrong I don�t really know why I end up there and there are people that tell stories and then stab everyone else that is running faster than them and then there�s the folks back home I remember the folks back home always looking for a handout always trying to get something that ain't theirs I feel like I will throw up all the secret rumors and microfilm information if given the chance I better watch out they better watch out I hold strings and I hold on to them tightly I don�t break that easy I will break others though I have no problem stepping on some toes here and there if it means I�m going to get something out of it I have no problems I have no problems I have no problems I have no issues I have no issues I have no issues I have some problems but it�s none of your business just because I don�t have the right medications to deal with this shit don�t mean now look you-

It�s so nice out here today that one would forget that overseas we�re killing all sorts of innocent people, we�re not �even� yet though, I don�t think we�ve killed as many as they did yet. I say we double it. I say we just kill the world to death.

I say we do some shit to get some shit done.

We want to hear your opinions. We tried to think what Timothy McVeigh would have thought of this whole thing, I said he probably would have thought the wtc/pentagon stuff was a great thing that happened. I bet he is having a good time in heaven. I mean hell, with those other dudes hanging out and shit.

I say we get killing.--9comma9--

The work day feels awful today, actually, I lied just now, it feels good I�ve made plans to leave here early today. I may drive north by myself, I may go home and jerk off over and over until I can�t move my arm. I may smoke drugs and drive east and west all at the same time. I may beat up a kitten with a stick. No I wouldn�t do that even if I was eating veal cutlets.

The band has a gig in a month. I�m excited rock and troll roll I mean.i want to play the music for the people and if they like it well then so be it that is nice thank you very much I want you to know that we love playing this place you guys are the best audience in the world why don�t you all get out of your seats and move your feet this next number is called � something or something and shit�

Come on frank, give me that shit and

before & after