I don't think one falls out of love ever. I don't really think that's possible. Me, I fall in love too easy. I attach myself to a wall and watch the room. I become the fly on the wall and sneak around listening and watching. I get how I get. Awkward, neurotic, childish, selfish, and whatever else emotion goes swirling through me at that time. I don't feel like I explain myself well enough ever. I beat around the bush and say all sorts of things, do all sorts of thing, and feel all sorts of things. My emotions go from here to..........................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................here in a second. Right now though, I only feel confusion. Confusion is good. Confusion is better than bitterness. Confusion is better than jealousy. Confusion is better than every feeling I've gone through in the past month. If I really knew what I wanted I would have that. If I really knew what I was doing anytime of the day I will have it. I feel sincerely different though. Different as I'm over here going this way. I feel as if I will never correctly remedy anything at this point. I feel like a foreign man with a different language out and about on a Saturday night. I don't know how to do either thing I did on Saturday night. Courtships and pleasant conversation about the weather and where'd ya go to school. I feel like I shouldn't even bring anyone else into this hell that is my emotions in July 2000. Oh wait, it's August on Tuesday. A new leaf get's turned over in August. Every August get's a new leaf. I don't change my mind. I don't just go from one extreme to the other for no reason whatsoever. Last night I had this dream: I'm standing at a train station waiting for a train to take me somewhere that wasn't really clear. I waited and finally the train came. I got on the train and realized it was the wrong train. I was going the wrong direction. I got off the train to try and get on the correct one. The train never came though. I ended up leaving the train station cursing my friend I was with.

I think I was drunk last night

before & after