I hate these douche bags that call and leave messages bitching and moaning about this that and the other thing. Usually their names end in �stein� or �berg� which isn�t really surprising in the least bit. A few months ago, this woman gave me so much shit, I ended up taking all of her personal information and using it to sign up for countless mailing lists, and eventually buying a copy of Mein Kampf from Amazon (one of the few companies that doesn�t ask for that secret number on the back of your credit card) with her credit card and had it shipped to her. Happy Passover. The mere fact that all of these religious holidays exist gets on my nerves. Now that I�m older I don�t get anything great for Christmas, I�m confident I will never believe in God or Jesus or flying unicorns, so why even bother. To be with family and friends? Thanks, but no thanks; I�d rather celebrate Flip Wilson�s birthday.

My cell phone is still out. This is now a record, 3 months last week. I quite enjoy not being reachable. Now if it would get just a couple degrees warmer, I could start taking off a little more.

Me-oh-my, you look like you did it.

before & after