Oh Joy!
2003-10-15 || Johnny Cash with a dick in his ass
Soundtrack � Carly Simon � I Just Fucked James Taylor

So the Red Sox are done, stick a fork in them. They have played like shit this whole series against the Yankees, who have proved again that they are the better team. Sure it would be great to see the Sox do it, but it�s doubtful at this point, the Yankees are the best team in baseball, what can you do? Not give a shit and move on I guess. If we had Jews controlling our team we would probably win tons of games too, unfortunately we don�t.

We watched the Fog the other night, and I remembered why John Carpenter was a shitty director. 1) he builds suspense only to cheese out and go for the obvious, 2) the music in his movies is unlistenable 3) he gets some of the worst actors in Hollywood like Kurt Russell, 4) Steals names of characters from other films, 5) He never really shows anyone getting killed. I want to see people being chopped up and stabbed and sliced and torn apart. 6) All of his movies are �John Carpenter�s��

Saturday we are playing a gig in an area of town where a good amount of minorities used to live. Gentrification has made it livable for homosexual guys in tight pants who love Pabst Blue Ribbon and shitty guitar rock nowadays. I think I�d rather have the minorities myself. Anyway, we are playing with a country band, who I�m sure will have the obligatory tired fucking Johnny Cash reference at some point. If they don�t, I will punch myself in the genitals.

Will you punch yourself in the genitals if I post some Johnny Cash autopsy photos up in this piece?

before & after