I just spent about 26 hours trying to scan the cover of the new Presley CD, and I still couldn�t do it. Now, I will murder a stuffed animal with a bladed instrument of mass destruction.

I would just as soon set off one of those grenades that gets certain people in the vicinity to get some quiet and �shut your fuckin guitar up� in that rehearsal complex. Do they make those? Those grenades. I wonder if at some point that will be a word men use to describe breasts on women. �Did you see that girls grenades?� I would never say anything like that. Wait, I just did.

I had to get up at �6 in tha mohnin� today to drive to New Hampshire, before going to Cambridge for work to pick up the CD�s. The people were friendly there. I now have boxes of CD�s in my room here. I know you want to buy one. Ask me.

We took a silly picture, we made fun of Breaux, and I decided to take it a step or two further

�Randy Rhoads for President�

�Outside of Kansas City, we took out our copy of Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance and I urinated all over it�

�the number of men who have reached orgasm while listening to anything by Helen Reddy�

�Ted fucked my sister, I fucked Ted�s aunt Ruth, Jerry fucked Carly Simon�s gynecologist on a boat�

�people who are into kites or putting models together should be doused with ammonia and poked repeatedly with knitting needles�

�Ethel Merman completely fucked up on Gin and Tonic uttering�

I REALLY WANT TO MEET JESUS I REALLY WANT TO MEET JESUS

I REALLY WANT TO MEET TOMMY SHAW I REALLY WANT TO MEET TOMMY SHAW

I WILL MAKE LOVE TO THE OUTER SPACENESS OF LIFE WHILE RIDING UPON A UNICORN OF DELIGHTFUL WIZARDRY. I WILL.

don�t rip and pull on the fucking unicorn you fucking hippie mountain climbing camping new age motherfuckers from New Mexico! Don�t do it I said

before & after