Oh Joy!
2003-02-06 || duke ellington, on mushrooms
Soundtrack � Charlie Parker � at Storyville

20 years ago sometime this year, I saw my second punk rock show at the club Storyville in Boston, and here I am listening to the Bird blowing there 30 years before that or so.

Colin Powell, Carlos Santana, and Teri Garr walk into a Cincinnati Bengals autograph singing, all three of them are on ecstasy.

Tonight, while literally saying to myself �I am in bad shape walking into this place, if someone looks at me the wrong way, I will snap at them� I was greeted with �Hi, welcome to Best Buy� twice.

Walking into Dunkin Donuts to get a coffee I heard the girl working say: �She only snorted heroin, she doesn�t have any track marks�. This woman looks like Richard Lewis, I swear to fucking god.

I�ve never actually felt like I was wasting time in my life. The only times I�ve felt this way were a) playing nickel slot machines, b) putting $50 on the trifecta that one time, and c) when I dated a girl who did cocaine.

Imagine if the song were called �Girlfriend With a Stoma� instead of �Girlfriend in a Coma�? I once dated a girl with a stoma, it was great as it was the only time I ever had a girl give me a blow job and kiss my stomach at the same time.

As of tonight, I am the proud owner of the Good Times Complete First Season DVD set, anyone wanna come over?

I am planning on having the second best thing happen tonight, by going to bed very shortly, there is still a number 12 on the clock. I am mentally, and physically drained of anything useful at this point, but the brief depression that attacked me yesterday and today seems to be gone, perhaps it�s the face of Jimmy Walker on the cover of this thing. I am in much need of rest and then I will be better I think, as of today I wasn�t okay really. I did maybe an hours worth of work in 9.5 hours at work, the rest of the time was spent staring blankly at my desk with my hands in my pockets, going outside smoking cigarettes, driving to pay my car payment, and having a Chinese man explain Chinese New Year to me, and me not understanding one single thing he said besides �It is different every year�, and �It was on February 1st this year�. What a nice man, it�s a shame I am unconsciously impatient when I can�t understand someone�s thick accent. A guy on a bike with sweatpants and headphones came into the restaurant while I was waiting for the food and said �you look familiar, you live around here?� I replied, �Salem, just moved here from Montana 2 weeks ago�. He answered �Oh, I used to live around here�. His attempt at small talk about Colin Powell on the TV was met with apprehension from me as I get real nervous when strangers talk to me about typical things. Now if he had said �Hey, do you think Bill Evans is actually more responsible for why Kind of Blue is one of the greatest jazz records of all time than Miles Davis is?� He would have had a conversation. As it stood I had no clue �what�s going on with this now, anything good?�. FWIW my argument has always stood that Miles was obsessed with Bill Evans� impressionist style influenced by Debussy, etc. That whole record has Bill�s voice on it, and with Miles style at the time it made for a turning point for jazz that Evans had been working on anyway. With all due respect to Miles, that�s my opinion if anyone gives a shit.

I saw a man with one sweatpant lifted up to reveal a gigantic new tattoo on his calf, a giant tiger with its paw up�oooh. Big scary tiger tattooed guy wants a new TV set; his wife wants a new keyboard for their son. The tiger tamer gets his way of course.

Heading to the city of brotherly love again. Afuckinggain. We love that place, I could live there I think.

Ooh, it�s 1:03 I�m out.

before & after