Oh Joy!
2000-08-04 || i like how the bugs stay home in the rain
Where do you want to go today? Today is a strange day. I look for bad things to happen. I make phone calls I know are going to piss me off, I don�t answer the phone though when I know a phone call is going to piss me off. Just when I�m looking for it. I�m always looking for it though. Things can�t go smooth and good every day; how boring would that be? I feel like it�s eating me from the inside�this feeling. The 1:36 am feeling. I get nothing out of days like this. A long boring fucking day with nothing monumental happening. Ya know, I don�t feel like saying anything tonight. Today it happened again a few times. One: Standing out in front of work, smoking a cigarette, I thought to myself �I wonder how that guy Lee is that quit a month ago?� two seconds later, he drove by and beeped at me and waved. He doesn�t live anywhere near work, and now works out of state somewhere. Two: At dinner with Annu I thought to ask her how �Matt� was, just as I was about to say something she said �I saw Matt last night��. This has been happening all the time lately. Fuck this, I can�t think straight, and don�t want to. This is all nothing right now. Same as in here, same as out there, same as it goes on.

before & after